How I Embarked on my Yoga Journey
I’ve always enjoyed exercising. Pre-college I did cheerleading and dance, which I loved! It kept me in great shape and I genuinely had fun doing it. Once I got to college, I decided to maintain my active lifestyle by going to the gym.
My fitness regimen consisting of using the only equipment I knew how to operate, the cardio machines. I would quickly hurry past the weight equipment (thinking it was a “boys only” zone) and hop on a treadmill. I would run for about three miles and follow it up with a few, lightweight dumbell moves and some ab work. Essentially, I was doing the same exact workout about six times a week, which began to take a toll on my body. I was getting shin splits from the continuous treadmill runs and found myself popping ibuprofen almost everyday before I went to the gym to be able to make it through my run. I felt like I was in shape and craved the rush of endorphins but my body was in pain.
During this time in my life, I also had terrible anxiety. The beginning of my freshman year was a tough one to say the least. I lived in a hotel-style dorm on a floor of mostly sophomores and barely made any friends. I felt alone. I cried. I woke up in the middle of the night with anxiety attacks. I called my mom a lot and found any excuse to go home for the weekend. After having such a tight knit group of friends all throughout high school, I wasn’t prepared to feel so alone and I worried that I had made the wrong choice going to school out-of-state where I virtually knew no one.
I joined clubs, went out of my comfort zone by texting acquaintances to meet for lunch and tried really hard to make friends (any of my fellow introverts know how hard this is!). Luckily by the second half of my freshman year, I made some good friends and began to find my footing. However, the anxiety that had developed over the first challenging months of the school year was still crippling me. I placed so much pressure on myself in everything I did from school to socializing and often times still felt so alone.
After months of running through shin splints and feeling stuck in a mind that never turned off or truly allowed me to enjoy myself, I decided I needed to make changes in my life. I researched ways to cope with the emotional weight I was bearing. I began taking medication for my anxiety and decided to try yoga. My mom and I went to our first yoga class together. As an ex dancer/cheerleader I thought it was going to be a piece of cake since I was flexible. To my surprise the class kicked my butt. I was sweating and moving and also thinking about my breath for the first time in my life. The first time I layed in savasana was the first time in a long time I had felt a sense of…what was it? Peace. Something I had not felt in a long time.
All of the sudden I was excited to exercise again. My body felt strong and stretched out and I didn’t need to take any ibuprofen. Paying attention to my breath got a little bit easier each class. I began to crave yoga. I fell in love with the practice and the way it made me feel. I started being more kind to the way I spoke to myself and starting showing more loving kindness to others in my life without even trying. After about a year and a half of practicing yoga and with the support of my doctor, I slowly stopped taking my anxiety medication. I’m currently adding more meditation and breath work into my routine, which is still a struggle for me due to my anxious tendencies. However, the benefits of my developing meditation practice have benefited me abundantly.
My path to the mat wasn’t one of glamour. It involved a lot of tears, anxiety and stress on my body before I caved in and decided to give this yoga thing a shot. But man, I wouldn’t change any part of my journey. I’m so grateful to yoga to bringing a sense of clarity and peace into my life that I didn’t think was possible. It pulled me out of a dark place and I feel so lucky that I can share it with others through my teaching.
How did your yoga journey get started? Share with me in the comments below ☺
