Happy Friday! I thought it was time to check in with a more personal post. I’ve had a few “ah ha moments” this week and I thought I’d share them.
Taking a Few Days to Introvert
If you regularly read the blog you probably already know I moved back in with my parents earlier this summer. Prior to moving home, I had my own apartment in Baltimore. I loved the freedom and independence that it gave me. I reveled in quiet moments and having my own space to call my own. My tiny apartment was a little haven for me to come home to each day, unwind and decompress.
Earlier this week I learned that my whole family would be gone the latter half of the week for various reasons (beach trip, brother going back to college, etc.) And while I had the opportunity to work from the beach with my family, I knew I could also really use a few days of quiet alone time. When my mom asked me what my plan was I said, “I think I’m going to take a few days to introvert.”
Alone time to recharge is really necessary for me. If I don’t get it, I feel exhausted and am honestly not very fun to be around. When I am honest with myself and take the time I need, I can show up for the people in my life much better. It also helps to set boundaries with those you love. They will (hopefully) appreciate your honesty and candor if you make your needs known, and understand that it will allow you to show up as a better daughter/son, significant other, friend, etc.
Just Listen to the Teacher
Some days I go to yoga class and the fire is already within me. I am ready to move, motivated and excited to work on poses. Other days, like earlier this week, I feel tired and energetically heavy. I was feeling like this in class on Wednesday, and I felt myself becoming frustrated. “Where is my concentration? Why don’t I feel motivated or energized to be here doing my favorite thing?” I was becoming annoyed with myself and the energy I brought to the mat that day.
Then I realized, I don’t need to motivate myself in this moment, all I need to do is listen to the teacher. All I have to do in this moment is stop letting these self-critical thoughts cloud my practice and tune into her voice. So that’s what I did. She cued warrior one and I moved there. Warrior two and I opened into the posture. Chaturanga and I flowed through the vinyasa.
It’s not a new concept to listen to the teacher and follow what he/she cues. I do it every class. The “ah ha moment” was the shift in concentration. I was concentrated on myself and the energy I was experiencing that day, beating myself up for feeling “blah.” The powerful switch came when I realized, all I have to do in this moment is listen to the teacher. She will guide me through.
The truth is, our energy is going to feel different every single day. Some days we will float through a yoga class (or a workout, a work day, a weekend) and other times it will feel heavy and uncomfortable. Don’t judge yourself for it. If you’re in a yoga class, listen to the teacher. If you’re navigating your way through a tough day, take this piece of advice from one of my favorite authors, Glennon Doyle. “Just do the next right thing one thing at a time. That’ll take you all the way home.”
Laugh Every Day
This week marked the five year anniversary of my Aunt Mare’s sudden passing. It’s an extremely hard day for my entire extended family because she was the glue that held us all together. I’ve mentioned her on the blog before, but she had the amazing quality of making every individual feel seen and accepted. She had the rare but beautiful ability to make you feel loved within seconds of meeting her.
She was also funny as shit. Don’t worry, she would appreciate the use of language 🙂 She was the goofiest, funniest person I knew and everyone who knew her will tell you they can still hear her laugh. Thinking of her a lot over the past few days (she’s really on my mind all of the time) has reminded me how important it is to laugh. I’m an introvert with anxiety so I’m really good at taking life seriously!! But life isn’t meant to be serious.
Life is short and fleeting. We never know when our time on this earth or the time of someone we love will come to an end. I don’t say that to scare anyone. I say it to remind us all that life is impermanent — we all know how fast the years fly by. So don’t forget to be silly. Don’t hold back your laughter. Show and tell those you love how much they mean to you. Thank you Mare (she would always correct me, “Aunt Mare”) for being the best example of a life filled with love and laughter. I’m so damn lucky to have had 20 years with you.
Have a beautiful weekend.
Morgan